Tolerance

I envy people who are not sensitive sleepers. Because I am quite sensitive, & what I hate are certain noises waking me up >_> & I'm feeling particularly grumpy (what my family usually calls me), so you should be able to guess what happened

A good example is the dog next door. My room is sorta right next to it compared to the other rooms in the house. & I dunno what is wrong with the dog, but he tends to bark in the middle of the night. I'm not sure how often he barks because I don't wake up every single night because of his barking, but there are times when I do wake up & am unable to sleep because of him. It's probably the only time when I have this deep desire/urge to KILL HIM T_T or at least, injure him to the extent that he wouldn' t be able to make any sound for the rest of his life ^__^ I hope that didn't freak anyone out, but this is preparing you for future violent posts of my (supposedly) dark thoughts.

When I complained about being woken up to my mum, she started talking about adapting & crap like that. She's always very good at annoying me, especially when I'm in this kinda mood. It's even more annoying, making it sound as though it is so easy when it's not, & I've already adapted from not being able to sleep with the light on to able to sleep as long as I cover my eyes kinda thing, but I'm still pretty sensitive in terms of noise.

Probably what's more annoying is that, I've changed. Thinking about myself, I know I was a spoilt brat & I wouldn't be offended or upset if I was still called a spoilt brat now (unless it was unjustified & assumed by some idiots who are very good at jumping to conclusions), but seriously, I've changed since last time. & it was because of my friends, not because of my family. Sad rite?

& I think I mentioned it before, that my family didn't seem to notice. Well, too bad for them. I just feel so frustrated sometimes that I'd want to shout it out, that I'm not like that anymore. But since they assumed, & their eyes aren't opened to see it, I can only hope that they realise it one day, somehow. Although I doubt that it's ever going to happen, but I don't really give a damn anymore.

Actually, this was one of the reasons why I started blogging. Not because I'd want other people to know something that even my own family doesn't (because that's my family's main opinion about bloggers), but because I wanna complain (which actually I do in private in my own diary manually) about these kinda things & they don't seem to want to know about me anyway, so I'm just sharing my feelings with other people. & also hope that they relate to me. But even if nobody is able to relate to me, it's fine because everyone is different in some way or other, so it's not surprising to have different problems. But I do know that I share a lotta similar problems with other people, & it does feel better to let it all out, so this could also encourage other people to blog emo posts like me lol. I hardly blog emo posts anyway, so I don't see why anyone should be tired of seeing my emo posts. & if you're tired, don't read. Simple.

Going back to the topic of sleeping, supposedly adapting means you WILL be able to sleep even though you couldn't previously (my mum didn't even mention show, she just said adapt). Maybe my mind is not open either, but telling that to me does not help me adapt in any way, & actually, I've heard her say it before, many times last time, I just forgot all about it till just now, since it's been a long time since I actually expressed my frustrations in tolerating something like this

My conclusion: Don't bother talking to someone about something if it is sure to annoy you. In some cases, it's better not to talk about it as well.