Rant

hi, I'm late, again ^^; as in, I meant to post earlier, but kept on delaying, & no, I'm not doing the tag today, but I still wanted to show my sort-of enthusiasm or liking in blogging, so here I am. You see, the tag needs pictures, & well, I still don't have them atm, & so I'm slowly trying to collect those stupid pictures, but I really want nice pictures! & they're not easy to get, based on my standards (lol ;-P), so if I'm really fed up, I'll just post the pics, & state that it's not as nice as it could be ^^;

Today's topic may be a bit boring though... after all, it's a rant (which, to be honest, I still don't really know what it mean, so I hope my interpretation of the word is correct).

Basically, what I'm gonna do is talk about my problems atm, but more in a complaining way. ^^; Normally, I don't like to do this, but I have felt stressed lately, & I thought I'd post this (actually, I was so frustrated that I really wanted to vent my frustration by writing all my feelings out, but I was so slow in actually getting to the writing that my urge to do it went away, but what the heck, I'm still writing it ;-P probably with less feeling than I wanted though, but at least my head is clear).

So if you're not interested in reading someone else complaining about their own life, then it's better that you don't read this.

Well, let me rant about the normal, or rather, more common thing first. My internal exam. Anyway, to be honest, what I didn't really tell anybody was how horrible I felt after my exam. >_<; Seriously, usually I'm not the kind of person who'd be affected by exams, or rather, my own performance in the exam because my principle is "what's past is past. no point crying over spilt milk." Which I do, actually, just not over spilt milk, but you get my point lol. Anyway, yeah, I felt really horrible, but it was super hard to tell anybody about it, because I'm so used to seeing other ppl moan about how badly they did, & I'd usually be listening to it, so after all that, I really didn't want to be one of the "moaning ppl" ^^;. But I really wanted to moan at that time, so I felt quite pathetic & worthless.

Also, another big reason why I didn't want to moan, which is also why I don't want to be one of the moaning ppl, & which also relates to my principle, is really because there is no point in repeating yourself about the same old thing, but that shows how strong our feelings are, I guess. Which is why, I realise, humans tend to repeat themselves. Most of the humans anyway, that I meet. Even I do it, & so I realise that I actually like to repeat saying certain things, but these are usually happy things, or funny things. Other ppl may repeat different things. I wouldnt' mind giving examples, but there are too many examples, so I feel it's better if you actually think about it yourself & see whether ppl actually do that, unless you know about it already, then congratulatons! I'm proud of you~ ^__^

The main thing that I wanted to rant about though, is the less normal thing, or rather, a problem not many people should be experiencing (at least, not the ppl I know) but it's a trivial matter, which is why I never really bothered to mention it. Anyway, I don't tell many ppl about this, but I always seem to have around 50GB on the com. yup, seriously, it's 50 friggin' GB!!! If you dare say it's not a big deal, I will try my best to put all the stuff on your com & see whether your com lasts with all that space of stuff. T_T; I mean, I normally can't help wondering where it all comes from. Then, after checking, I'll be thinking, "Oh, rite, this 10GB is from here, that 15GB is from there," & it kinda adds up. But I've been burning & burning & still it's around there. Obviously, I download too much but I really don't wanna stop downloading. Maybe I'm not so good at compiling stuff to burn, which shows just how obsessive-compulsive I am, because I like things to be as perfect as possible, which most of the time they're not, but it's not totally imperfect. I do sort of plan what I want to burn when I download it. There just seem to be a lot of potential stuff that I want to burn, but they're just incomplete, which is actually my problem, I think.

Anyway, the latest thing that happened, which may be amusing, is that I realised I had 50GB (again) on my com, so I decided to burn, & I saw 2 potential dvds I could burn (it's like, "What, only 2?!?" lol). So, I started actually d/ling to burn those 2 dvds, & guess what? When I finally burned it, & checked the folder I have, it was 49GB... I was like, "WTH?!?!?" So I was trying to figure out why 2 dvds, which shld be 7-8GB burned off (& deleted obviously from the com) result in only 1 GB or so difference from before I burned. Then, I realised that I downloaded so much during the past week (including the stuff that I burned) that it actually came up to that amt, & I was kinda back to where I started. Well, not really, cos if you think about it, I have more than previously, with what I downloaded, but back to where I started in the sense that I made no progress in trying to clear space on the com.

Actually, I think that I wouldn't care so much about all that space if my dad wasn't nagging me about it, but he doesn't always nag me about it, & yet it feels like a problem for me because of the fact that he does nag, & it's still often enough to make me feel that our computer is in danger, or being slow, or lagging, just because of all my stuff. So, it may be a good thing that he's nagging me, because then I'll do sth about it (or at least try to), but I feel so stupid at times to get stressed or feel pressured about these kinda things >_>

Anyway, before I start repeating myself, & ranting some more, I thought I'd end it here, because although I'd like to moan & complain more (I got in the mood again haha), it's just that I can't help feeling it's boring (to read), & I still don't like the fact that I'm moaning, although at least I finally did it, & it's in writing! XD so that's my evidence that I grumbled lol ^^

Besides, I think I wrote a lot, but I am long-winded, so maybe that's why I delay so much at blogging, cos I knew I can't help going on & on ^^;

So, anyway, I thought I'd end with a pic, but it's not a great pic, just more of evidence haha.

As you can see, it's less than 50GB by a bit, but that's because I burned another dvd after that & also 3 cds at least, so it should be less than 50, but... still not much difference. ^^;

Btw, the things I wanted to write more about, were actually the details of where all that 50GB came from, but I thought that would be also quite boring, & it would take more effort on my part, because I'd be putting more pics here ^^;

But seriously, when I was thinking about all the stuff I burned, I can't help thinking that I burned at least 50 GB over the past year, which shows just how much I have downloaded since last year when I got the unlimited connection. O_O

I'll just say this, though, although I know I shouldn't, but it'll make me happy, so please don't mind me. My gay comics, which I started downloading since last year, are around 20GB! XD XD & still more to come~ (btw, the 20GB is not included in the 50GB, cos I burned at least 12GB & deleted it already, so 20GB is like the total of all that I have) ^__^ & I found out that someone else has 32GB of gay comics, so I was thinking, "Haha, I've still got a long way to go lol" XP

& now I'm tired, so I'll go to sleep~ *__*

PS: If you noticed, I did repeat myself in a way, as in, one of the things about me is that I tend to overuse a number of words, & I am predictable in that way (close friends who hang out with me all the time normally notice this, you see, & tease me about it). So, you may have spotted it, which I wouldn't be surprised, but if you didn't, then that makes me happy, but see whether you can or not! XP